Olympian Lolo Jones wrote an emotional Facebook post after being the first competitor eliminated from Dancing With The Stars on Tuesday night, painting her competition as something bigger than just the fun dancing competition that many paint it to be.
When you go so many times rejected in public you put walls up. When I was dancing last night and messed up I had flashbacks of the three Olympics and that people constantly tease me about. I thought oh no here it comes again. People are going to ridicule me. I’m so tired of feeling embarrassed.
I joined the other competitors upstairs and I couldn’t force a smile on my face. I felt like vomiting and in between the other dances I went in a back room and fought back tears. I felt so broken. So unlovable. [Embarrassed.]
My brief time on #DWTS was a lasting lesson. I really wanted to stay on the show and have the layers of hurt wash away by showing the public how hard I work. I wanted to come away a victor for once. I wanted to do so good performing in public that the haters would stop teasing me.
But that is my way of thinking. Not Gods. Instead I need to trust God that he would heal my heart. That I would not work so hard for the world to validate and redeem me but know that God already conquered that for me on the cross.
My time was brief but the lesson is lasting. Thank you everyone who wrote me kind messages. You were helping me not fall into darkness.
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